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In the midst of life...

George's funeral today was something of a low-key event, witnessed only by his immediate family and a handful of friends. It followed the usual pattern of a formal reception, a final viewing of the body (I know it's a cliché, but he did look peaceful and serene), a few short commemorative speeches and some carefully chosen pieces of music. His elder brother Peter had come to fetch us (our cousin Ingrid, my sister and myself) off the train, and although the reason for our gathering was a sad one, we soon fell into our old way of easy friendship, good-natured teasing and laughter...esp. after the service when we'd dried our tears and gone to Peter's for an impromptu lunch. We vowed we wouldn't be strangers and we'd see each other again in the new year...more as a declaration of intent than a fast agreement, but I do hope we can stick to it.

My uncle went through the ceremony in a daze...it must be so hard to have to bury a child, I can't begin to think how he must be feeling. It doesn't matter whether the child in question is 2, 12 or 42; for a parent to survive their children in our affluent Western society is just not the way things are supposed to be. And when the death is sudden and without any attributable cause like accident or illness, it must be even more bewildering and upsetting.

Later, my sister helped me pick out a party outfit for tomorrow's shindig -- it's not the evening gown hp's Activity Committee were hoping for, but something equally as festive that I feel far more comfortable in and can wear on other occasions as well.

Comments

( 14 Speak Like A Child — Shout To The Top )
ter369
Dec. 15th, 2006 08:35 pm (UTC)
I'm just catching up on my Flist and read your first post about your cousin. I'm so sorry. I hope your new year brings more meetings with your cousins, for the best reasons.
gamiila
Dec. 15th, 2006 08:45 pm (UTC)
Thank you; and I hope we do, too.
enigmaticblues
Dec. 15th, 2006 08:50 pm (UTC)
I'm glad his funeral went well, and was a time to reconnect with family. *hugs*
gamiila
Dec. 15th, 2006 09:43 pm (UTC)
It was good seeing them again. Thanks.
kathy1975
Dec. 16th, 2006 12:25 am (UTC)
I'm so sorry for your and your family's loss

It's heartwrenching that he had to die at such a young age...
gamiila
Dec. 16th, 2006 08:46 am (UTC)
Thank you. We're recovering from the shock, but my poor uncle...23 Months ago he lost his wife of almost 50 years, now he's lost a son; I don't know how he can cope. I was lost for words yesterday, though I gave him what comfort I could.
kathy1975
Dec. 16th, 2006 09:04 am (UTC)
I cannot even start to imagine the despair one must experience after first losing a wife and then a son.

Even though I don't know your uncle it makes me cry to think of what he has to go through. The question why life is so cruel and unfair to one person springs to mind...but I know that this does not help.

Sometimes words cannot be comfort anyway. I am sure your being there was enough and knowing that you share his loss and pain in some way.





desdemonaspace
Dec. 16th, 2006 02:23 am (UTC)
The best thing about funerals is reconnecting with the living. It's the only good thing, maybe. I feel so sorry for your uncle. It must be Hell. I can't imagine what he's feeing. I will remember him, and all of your family, in my prayers.
gamiila
Dec. 16th, 2006 08:50 am (UTC)
Thank you, that is most kind.
anonypooh
Dec. 16th, 2006 07:53 am (UTC)
sorry to hear of your loss - only just now, for I'm an lj stranger - rest in peace George. Here's to a happy new year cousin reunion! xx
gamiila
Dec. 16th, 2006 08:52 am (UTC)
Thank you. Your Christmas card arrived day before yesterday - here's to the reunion and to the travel plans!
anonypooh
Dec. 16th, 2006 12:10 pm (UTC)
mmm travel plans ;) Enjoy the shindig!
meko00
Dec. 16th, 2006 02:44 pm (UTC)
I'm so sorry for your loss, and for your uncle's loss. Hope you'll meet your cousins more often.
gamiila
Dec. 16th, 2006 02:51 pm (UTC)
Thank you.
( 14 Speak Like A Child — Shout To The Top )

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