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I've ground to a halt

I should be putting more effort in. I should be out there, looking for work. I should be writing letters, phoning recruiters and possible employers, but I just can't get myself to do any of it. Instead, I'm looking at pictures of myself back in the day when life was sweet and uncomplicated.

Click here to view these pictures larger

Comments

( 12 Speak Like A Child — Shout To The Top )
enigmaticblues
Jul. 11th, 2012 03:26 pm (UTC)
*big hugs*
gamiila
Jul. 12th, 2012 12:14 pm (UTC)
Bedankt!
dalmeny
Jul. 11th, 2012 03:31 pm (UTC)
Negative feedback is demotivating.

I hope working with the career counsellor helps to bring back your vim.
gamiila
Jul. 12th, 2012 12:13 pm (UTC)
Thank you. I hope so too, as I've just received her invoice! ;-)

One thing's for sure, though: next job I find, I hope will stay interesting enough and I can keep until retirement, because I never want to have to experience this level of lethargy and depression again.
deborahw37
Jul. 11th, 2012 05:31 pm (UTC)
((hugs))
gamiila
Jul. 12th, 2012 12:13 pm (UTC)
Thank you kindly.
curiouswombat
Jul. 11th, 2012 06:31 pm (UTC)
Oh I do hope you find something soon.

As for the pictures - aren't they neat? Is that your grandmother with you in the first one? You look very 'you' right from toddler-hood - and there is certainly quite an indicator of your love for interesting shoes in one of those early ones!
gamiila
Jul. 12th, 2012 11:55 am (UTC)
Thanks.

I hadn't realised that in sharing my pictures in this way, the captions I'd given them wouldn't be shown. So yes, that is my (maternal) grandmother with me at 5 weeks old in the first photo.

Her name was Eunice Alice de Ceuninck van Cappelle, but as soon as I started to speak I had my own name for her: 'Oma Darling'. All my family thought that was really clever of me, but she and I knew that it was really from the song she used to sing to me, "oh my darling/oh my darling/oh my daaaar-ling Clementine..."

My parents lived in with her until after the birth of my sister, which means she was a constant presence in my life for the first 2 years. She died when I was 4, yet I still remember her quite clearly; probably because of that early history.

Those booties are\were quite stylish for a baby, weren't they?

Edited at 2012-07-12 11:56 am (UTC)
brutti_ma_buoni
Jul. 11th, 2012 07:33 pm (UTC)
Beating yourself up *never* helps. Cease at once!

I love the pictures.
gamiila
Jul. 12th, 2012 12:22 pm (UTC)
Yes, ma'am!

I hadn't looked at those pictures in years (decades). I'm glad they survived all the house moves and general neglect, though -- at this remove in time, it's lovely to be able to look back and see what a magical time the Sixties were for growing up in.
melegyrn
Jul. 12th, 2012 03:55 am (UTC)
I think I can understand, being in a similar space for a very different reason.

I don't know if I have any words of wisdom to offer....just take care of yourself as best you can, and know, as much as it can help, that I hope and pray something comes your way soon.

Thanks for sharing the photos--I did enjoy them. I 'm quite envious of those lovely boots :-)
gamiila
Jul. 12th, 2012 12:06 pm (UTC)
Next time my mum chides me for my shoe obsession, I can turn around and tell her it's all her fault anyway, and that I've got the picture to prove it! ;-)

Thanks for...well, you know. It'll come, I've no doubt of that, only it's taking a bit longer than I thought it would.
( 12 Speak Like A Child — Shout To The Top )

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